Title: Confidant
Author: scy
Feedback: scynneh@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: Not mine
Fandom: Gossip Girl
Pairing: Chuck/Nate, Chuck/Blair, Chuck/Georgina, Eric/Asher
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: up through the entire first season
Summary: Eric is unlucky in love, Chuck has perspective
Author's Notes: Sandrine encouraged this, as did Seperis, who laughed at me on aim the entire time I plotted this out. Thanks to you both. XOXO.
August 2008

Even though he hadn't expected it to go perfectly, Eric was still amazed at how much of a disaster he'd had with the first boy he kissed. And it had been kind of traumatic for Serena and a bunch of other people, so he wasn't looking to do that again. That didn't mean his present company didn't think differently.

Chuck was drinking something out of a flask that he told Eric to ignore when he heard that, and he swallowed and stared.

"You're kidding."

Eric looked down.

"No."

"You're going to give up on sex because it might bother people. Your sister, in particular."

"Sort of."

"That's incredible," Chuck said.

Eric nodded.

"And the height of self denial and stupidity."

Eric blinked. "What?"

"You're a young man on the cusp of figuring out the direction your life should take and you're going to cut yourself off from an entire aspect of yourself."

"I have to."

"To please other people? Not to upset them?"

Chuck sat up and scooted across the bed. "That. Is. Stupid."

"How can you say that?"

"Because that won't help you at all."

What Eric had done, what his family had gone through, he didn't think that he ever wanted to see that look on Serena's face again.

"It shouldn't just be about me."

Chuck let out a long breath. "You sound alarmingly like Nathanial in one of his less entertaining self flagellating moods."

Eric had always been curious about what the older kids got up to. Serena never lied to him, but she avoided telling him things that she thought he didn't need to know.

"Nate?"

"Yes, my friend, or ex friend, depending on the season and where Blair's affections are resting for the evening."

He probably shouldn't think that was funny, but Eric couldn't help but grin.

"She's important to both of you."

Chuck eyed Eric. "You're fishing."

Eric lifted his chin. "Might be."

"If you want to know something. don't ever be afraid to ask."

"What's the deal with you and Nate and Blair?"

"We've been friends for years."

"Yeah, I know that, everybody knows that, I think it's like the gospel on Gossip Girl that you three, and Serena are this dream team."

Now Chuck's smile was wider. "So spit it out. What are you really after?"

"Have you ever done anything with Nate? I mean, kissing and stuff?"

"Very good, Eric." Chuck leaned back on his elbows, legs brushing up against Eric's.

"Nate and I have shared many an evening in the company of easily persuaded women, and together have enjoyed charms." Chuck shrugged. "But Nate has always insisted on taking the couch afterwards."

Eric waited for Chuck to clarify.

"What happens in bed, does not carry over, at least not for Nathanial."

"But you guys have done more than sleep together."

"No, Eric, I'm saying that Nate would do just about anything but sleep in the same bed as another guy and not feel the need to justify it in the morning."

Chuck extended his arms over his head. "It gets tedious."

"So you know what it's like when the person you have feelings for doesn't want to tell anybody about them in public."

"Twice over," Chuck said.

"It's like you're not good enough to be seen with them, because if anyone else knew, it would make them less popular or something," Eric said and felt himself choking on the last words.

He wasn't going to cry over Asher, he had known what would happen and had done what he could to get out with his pride intact. After having his problems on display for so long, he had given up on having any dignity.

"Believe me, Eric, I know all about being kept secret so that somebody else won't lose status," Chuck said.

"How do you deal with it?"

"Get even."

"And if that's the kind of person I am?"

"Then find somebody better." Chuck took in Eric's slump and shook his head. "You will find another boy out there who is hot and intelligent enough to realize you're much better than all the others have realized."

Eric wiped his eyes. "You sure?"

"Absolutely." He leaned over and rubbed Eric's back. "I'll even help you look if you want."

Surprised, in spite of himself, Eric shook his head. "Not right now, thanks."

"Just let me know," Chuck said, and there was a knock.

His mom put her head around the door. "Can I get you boys anything?"

"No, Mom, we're fine, thanks."

"Oh, would you two like to join me at the architect's this afternoon? Bart wants me to have a project to manage." She smiled. "And Jonas Velke is an unapologetic ass, I could use the company."

"We'd be delighted, Lily," Chuck said, and Eric was surprised to see them give each other a fond look.

"Thank you, and if we all make it through the afternoon, I'll buy us all lunch."

As the door closed behind her, Eric glanced at Chuck.

"Do you think this will last?" Eric asked. "My mom and your dad."

"Bart picks out wives like other men do a good suit. He chooses what feels and looks right hanging on his arm, and if he doesn't like something, he gets it altered."

"My mother isn't a suit," Eric said.

"No, she certainly isn't." Chuck rolled off the bed and tugged Eric up. "Come on, we'd better get going, Gordon, the driver," he said for Eric's benefit, "starts chewing antacids when we're late."

Eric and Chuck followed Lily to her meeting and did, as they said, provided company. He was grateful that Chuck didn't call her by anything but her first name, anything else would have seemed insincere. But, Chuck went beyond being polite, he offered suggestions in a low voice, steered Lily past assistants, and was generally indispensably helpful.

When his mom had dropped them off after a filling meal at a restaurant Chuck recommended, Chuck insisted that Eric needed to spend some time with another guy.

"Where are we going?" Eric asked.

"Someplace quiet," Chuck said, and murmured directions to the driver.

Eric had been thinking about the way that Chuck acted around his mother, and as the limousine moved smoothly through traffic and pulled up to the curb, he grinned, having worked out what it was.

"You like my mom."

Chuck nodded at the doorman, and Eric only had time to blink when he realized they were in a place called Victrola.

"Don't you?"

"She is a complicated woman," Chuck said as he steered Eric to a table.

"That's not an answer."

"No, it's not." Chuck lifted a hand and a waiter approached.

"Your usual, sir?"

"Yes."

"And for the young sir?"

"A daiquiri."

Eric shook his head at Chuck, who smiled.

"Without the alcohol," Eric said.

"Virgin it is," Chuck said, and exchanged an amused look with the waiter.

"Right away, Mr. Bass."

"I'm fourteen," Eric said, wondering why he had to remind Chuck of that.

"So?"

"You think I should be drinking and sleeping around?"

"If you want to," Chuck said, and when Eric folded his arms over his chest, sighed.

"Were you doing all that when you were my age?"

Chuck shook his head, and Eric felt triumphant for an instant.

"I was fourteen when I lost my virginity." Chuck considered. "The first time."

"You did?" Eric didn't think Chuck was lying, but he might be embellishing, the way he liked to when he wanted to startle someone.

The waiter set their drinks neatly in front of them and disappeared.

Eric took a sip. "How was it?"

"Unforgettable."

Eric stared at Chuck and didn't see any of the normal smugness he usually wore after he'd said something that was shocking or that put him at advantage. "Wasn't it good?'

"Sex isn't always like they say, Eric." Chuck gave him his full attention, and Eric sat up taller. "It can be fantastic, horrible, or anywhere in between the two."

"So it was somewhere in there?"

"Choose your first lover carefully," Chuck said. "They won't be your last, but they should be special."

"Because that's not what happened to you," Eric guessed.

Chuck's smile was warm, and approving. "That first time, no."

"I wouldn't repeat the experience."

"Who was it with?" Eric asked. He couldn't push Serena about these things, some stuff a big sister just didn't want her brother to know. But Chuck apparently thought that full disclosure was better, and Eric had heard a lot more about Serena's times as a wild girl than his mother or sister had ever let slip.

"Someone you should avoid, even if you're not interested in the fairer sex," Chuck said. "Georgina."

"Like, Serena's Georgina?"

"Once upon a time, yes, those two were all but inseparable," Chuck agreed.

Eric had watched the older kids a lot, enough to get some idea of how they related to each other, even if he didn't quite get all the complicated variations.

"Where did you fit in?"

"A lot of places," Chuck said, and Eric's ears got red.

He glanced at Chuck's glass and then picked up his own drink. "What about me?"

"Where do you want to be?"

"I'd just like to meet someone who wasn't fake and didn't have twelve different schemes going at once, no offense."

Chuck saluated him. "None taken, it's an acquired taste."

"How do you keep it all under control?"

"What else do I have to do?"

"You're here with me, right now." For some reason, he liked being with Eric, and had gone out of his way to spend time alone with him a lot lately.

"As your older brother, it's my job to look out for you, and to make sure that you know how to find a good time."

Eric knew what Serena would think of that, and how freaked out she would be just by him choosing to be with Chuck. Still, Eric knew what to expect from Chuck, and that in spite of everything he was infamous for, that he wouldn't let anything happen to Eric that wasn't his choice. 

"Fine, what do you suggest?"

"Have a sip of this," Chuck passed his drink over. "Just one, and then I'll take you someplace you'll like."

"Am I going to regret this?" Eric asked.

"No, but I promise it will be memorable," Chuck said.

Eric took a small sip, and Chuck smiled.

-end