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SV in Pepsi Sponsorship Deal

SV are proud to announce a sponsorship deal with Pepsi-Cola Inc.

Due to the increasing public demand for the camera shy club squad of SV Hungover, Pepsi-Cola have provided the club with a worldwide marketing opportunity to reach out to each and every SV fan.

Not only will the public be able to buy specially SV branded Pepsi cans, bottles and merchandise with various SV players featuring, but SV will be appearing in their own 'themed' Pepsi TV advert, that will be badly dubbed into several languages and beamed worldwide, and it will not feature the ugly Brazilian Roberto Carlos.

Pepsi have also agreed an on-can 'instant win' competition. Details as follows:

1st Prize: If you find a cyrogenically frozen SV branded Hamster and Gerbil together in your can of Pepsi, then you have won the top prize.

You will be flown to SV's Playboy Mansion for an evenings entertainment, followed by a weeks 'training' camp with the SV squad. Please note: The weeks 'training' is only available to the female population, and will only apply if the winner passes the SV attractiveness and loose moral stance standards.

2nd Prize: Upon finding a cryogenically frozen Gerbil, you win one of 10 signed specially commissioned SV-Pepsi branded balls. We may also send a member of the squad to stalk you for a week.

3rd Prize: If you find a lowly frozen Hamster in the can, then you win one of SV's priceless holiday photos. Please note: The player of your choice may not be available in which case, you will be sent a photo frame bought from a well known pound shop featuring one of those classic 'catalogue' pose shots, of someone completely unrelated to SV.

N.B. Upon opening a winning can, do not drink the contents, as you will forfeit the prize and also you may die. The Hamster or Gerbil in question may also defrost and eat your family. SV cannot be held liable or responsible in the case of death or bodily harm caused to you or anyone else by the said contents. Keep out of direct sunlight, only use upon doctors advice, if symptoms persist just die will you? Does exactly what it says on the tin, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, mushroom, mushroom.

Caption Competition

Winner of the caption competition is....: Aw Wan Foot (aka Reekster) - with the following entry:

"After losing his wife owing to an obsession with internet porn, Celtic's Bobby Petta last night took his caveman lust a stage further by attending SV's annual cross-dressing suck-fest frenzy."

Let me know what biscuits you want and i'll pick'em up for you.

We'll have a brand new competition up as soon as I've thought of something amusing.

Your caption here!!

Winner of the caption competition is....: SV Pin Up Boy - with the following entry:

de Souza: Don't look now, but the guy behind me has a huge Sony Ericsson mobile phone sitting on his lap

Dave T: One too many CC and Coke's for you Gaffer.....

So its a pack of biscuits of your choice sir, let me know what they are on the forum and ill pick em up for ya. The next caption competition will be posted later this week once I have got the picture from the Dutchboy.

Your caption here!!

SV in the honors list from BBC Scotland's Off the Ball.

SV has been linked by 'Off the Ball' in connection with its feature 'funny 5-a-side team names.' Contained in their final listings, SV Hungover have the honor of having the only link to a team website. While the reason for this may be that we are the only team in the list with a website, we still show our gratitude for the link, although please dont visit too often or i'll get ma baws booted for having too much traffic from our provider.. We are sure that this will only assist in our bid to become five-a-side legends, and help inflate our already huge egos even further. Off-The-Ball, we salute you.

If you fancy having a gander at the Off the Ball website check out our links page. For the article containing our rocket to superstardom click here

Exciting Opportunity for Talented Young Female.

Job Title: Club Secretary

Key Responsibilities
As part of the continually sucessful SV Hungover establishment, you will be expected to perform to the best of your ability the following duties: Some general club 'admin', servicing the players and advising them on their social calander, partaking in said social calander without complaint. Also team roasting sessions are a compulsary requirement of the job, as is direct liasion with team physio Hallota Phagina for the purposes of filming with a view to distribution. As part of the role you will be required to stimulate significant growth off the pitch. It also requires you to help motivate and simulate an already hugely talented squad. This is an excellent opportunity for a talented young individual to gain experience and assume multiple positions everyday.

Skills Required
You must be of age 18-30, enthusiastic, good looking and have breasts. You are expected to have excellent oral, manual and team-working skills although there will be an element of one on one involved. Shorthand skills will not be tolerated. While there is full on the job training provided, any experience is beneficial.

If you think you are the type of person we are looking for, contact club manager Delminho de Souza to arrange an audition followed by a roasting. We look forward to receiving your applications.

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